Nothing below the belt or inside the body either.

Nothing even that stinks, although the smell in a colonoscopy unit is enough to make you want to sow your lips closed just in case a stink particle floats into your mouth.

…Still doesn’t make me gag.

=> Learn the 4 essentials to writing, what I like to call, “killer GAMSAT essays”.

The ONLY thing that has ever made me gag uncontrollably involved little a sweet, little old lady and….

Huk.

.

.

Huuuuk…

I … I can’t… even…

Ugggh.

I’m going to have to push through.

*I can do this.*

woooof.

Ok.

Here goes:

I was in 4th year at UNDS and went to Wagga Wagga, NSW, for 4 weeks to do a rural placement with a GP.

It was nice.

There wasn’t much to do in Wagga other than go to the gym.

I’d eat a kilogram of fish every day (seriously – I was on a ‘pescaterian’ diet, meaning I didn’t eat meat except fish), and trained every second evening. It’s the strongest I ever got, except for now of course. 😎

During the day I’d sit in with the GP.

Mostly just watching and trying not to fall asleep.

(Don’t get me wrong, I was super keen. There just wasn’t much for me to do)

Then, one day the GP turned to me and said,

“Tom, can you please join me in the procedure room”

Finally!

“Hold this kidney dish under Mrs Smith’s ear.”

I obliged with a ssspRing in my step.

Mrs Smith (not her real name) was having difficulty hearing. After looking inside her ears with an otoscope the GP jumped into action.

Something had to be done.

My big moment had arrived.

This was going to be EPIC!

What are we going to do, I thought, cut off her ear?

Ok maybe not the whole ear…

But a cancerous legion? 😃

Maybe there’s an insect laying eggs in there?

(Ok, that one’s a stretch)

Or even better…

Some kind of huge boil filled with pus. That stuff is so gross but so satisfying to watch.

The GP carefully gave me the instructions:

I had the Kidney dish positioned under the ear with one hand.

And she gave me an almost comically large syringe filled with luke-warm water in the other.

My very important task was to…

Spend the next 25 minutes slowly squeezing that water into Mrs Smith’s ear to wash out the ear wax. 😑

Sigh.

I guess medical students are free labour after all.

But twenty five minutes?!

What was she expecting would…and then it happened…

Huuuuk…

.

I had to look away. It was too much.

The golden brown chunks of earwax started to plop out of this sweet, innocent old lady’s ear and swooshed around in the kidney dish.

Round and around they swam, taunting me.

The water warming up the dish in my hand made it so much worse… some even dripped onto my hand.

(CUT IT OFF! I’ve got another one)

I was using all my best centering techniques, breathing techniques, mindset methods, everything, to try to avoid vomiting all over this lady’s face.

I’d never had this reach before.

I could handle amniotic fluid on my clothes, blood, urine, spit and even vomit…

But this seemingly benign bodily excrement, earwax, was and still is my achilles heel. 😔

I wonder what yours will be… 😉

If you can’t wait to find out,

And want to get a great score in the essay section of the GAMSAT then click here to learn our 4 essentials for writing killer bee… ah.. I mean, killer GAMSAT essays.

Cheers,

Dr “I have super clean ears now” Tom

P.S. Here are just a few of the things we’ll address in the training:

* The #1 thing that GAMSAT markers are looking for in your essays (they let it slip in a recent document we uncovered) – if you don’t have this it doesn’t matter how many practice essays you write or how amazing a writer you are, you’re pretty much guaranteed to get a shockingly bad score.

* A simple and effective way to come up with almost endless interesting essay ideas…and do it in seconds even if you have the imagination of a brick and less knowledge about the theme than said brick (we learnt from a Journalist who writes to a deadline for a living).

* Two essay structures that have helped to increase essay scores by 25 points and created doctors out of people who barely spoke the language, like Donghxu from China who ended up getting into UQ (I’ll use him as a case study).

* An often overlooked technique to impress the marker with your thinking, argument and flow of ideas… even if you don’t really have any.

* The three steps you need to take right now to be ready for whatever essay topic they throw at you in the exam, even if you’re stressed and feel like this exam is a write-off.

* Why friends who review each other’s essays are probably going to score far worse than someone who applies this proven strategy to making sure your essays are in the 70+ range (even if English is your second language and you’re a science student who’s terrible at essays).

* How to deal with the timeframe so you can get it done without panic and articulate your best ideas.

* Why the essay section is the EASIEST place to increase your score – most people will tell you it’s the hardest!

* My single best way to make your essays stand out from the THOUSANDS of others you are competing against.

*And much more.

Click here to reserve your spot.