Check out this zinger from one of my r/GAMSAT trolls, gamta2.

(I have a couple of them…I’m kind of a big deal, you’d you know)

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“Their S2 essay marking is an utter joke. You get back your essay and there’s like 2 pages of typed feedback and you’re like “holy shit wow!” then you start reading it and realise that only the first paragraph is relevant to your essay, and the remaining 1.5 pages is a pre-typed response which ‘suggests’ how you should have answered the question. So you’re basically getting your spelling checked and a brief one-paragraph feedback ‘Emma, your essay was very good but you lack a clear thesis statement. You should develop your ideas a little more. Also your third paragraph could have been better.

…

F*ck PassGAMSAT

100% Scam’”

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Woaw.

Don’t they sound like the most needy (and potentially unhinged) date you’ve ever been on…

“I know you got me flowers and a card, and ‘holy shit wow!’… buuuut…. you didn’t write enough of a special message for ME on the card. So … I hate them, they’re ugly and so are you.

F*ck you.

100% loser!”

Yeesh.

Everyone loves an emotionally unstable date… 😬

They also make for great students! And doctors, don’t you know.

(Not sure if you got the sarcasm there).

But I’m disappointed by this poor level of trolling.

I hope they put more effort into their GAMSAT preparation (or their GAMSAT students…wait for the twist at the end) than this lack-luster discussion of our Essay Bootcamp because they completely missed the following aspects of our Bootcamp:

* The 6 part course where we teach you, from scratch, how to write Killer GAMSAT essays.

* The 7 additional tutorials on things such as capturing the marker’s attention from the first line, coming up with essay ideas on topics you know nothing about, what to read for the essay section, even on one…

How to score in the 100th percentile and others.

* The “Hot Seat” training series where one of our Essay Specialists analysed and pulled apart our students’ essays live, in-depth, giving advice, strategies, and techniques on how to improve. There are eight of them, each is an hour long and they usually do a max of 2 essays per session (That’s a lot of time to spend on grammar and spelling 😅)

* The three sample responses you get for our marked essays – one sample is of a bad essay, one a moderate, and one a great one so that you can compare, get tips, see where you stand and what to aim for.

* Our super-duper GAMSAT essay Quote Generator that gives you extra essays to practice on.

* And of course there is the now-infamous “utter joke” of 24 marked essays with 2 pages of feedback from our specialist team. And the estimated mark we give each of them is based on a unique rubric we’ve created over the last 14 years which shows you what the markers are actually looking for.

hmmm not sure why they missed all of that.

But let’s address the elephant in the zoom-room…

The pRe-TyPeD! stuff.

Yeah, a part of those 2 pages is ‘pre-typed.’

As in, it’s the same for every person for that specific essay.

Each essay has different pre-typed stuff specific to that essay/topic.

We literally just copy and paste it into the bottom of the feedback once our team has written up and exhausted all the individualised feedback we could have possibly given for that essay.

And the fact that it is pre-typed is exactly what makes it so valuable…

Something that our shortsighted and worryingly neurotic GAMSAT-date missed in their haste to try desperately to find faults where there really weren’t any.

(No wait… there are probably some typos somewhere 😱)

Here’s the thing:

We could have just left it at the individualised feedback and been done with it.

That would have been easier, faster and cheaper for us to do, especially logistically, with 24 different copy-pastes to do for dozens of students by multiple markers. One mistake and it’s all fudged.

But we actually wanted to be helpful.

Strange, right?

You see,

In the GAMSAT you’re competing with other people, right.

Meaning,

How you perform compared to others is important. 

In fact, it’s kind of everything.

Also, what others did in the past that worked is valuable information and a lesson that you can apply, making you better. But unless someone tells you what that is, you’re not going to know and you’ll miss out on it.

(Plus, our students tend to have similar problems with any particular essay. So the things they can do to improve are often similar.)

So we could have left all of that out and just given the individualised feedback…

Which btw is almost a page worth of high-quality stuff which on its own is enough for most people…

Instead,

We thought, why not give our students even more feedback, guidance and help on top of the individualized stuff. 

…Why throw all those lessons away when we can tell them what worked for others for these types of essays, how they can do the same and how to stand out compared to their competition.

That way you can perform even better than just with the strictly individualized stuff, for no extra cost to you, yet considerable pain-in-the-butt for us.

And that’s what the extra pre-typed stuff is:

Extra feedback and guidance you wouldn’t otherwise get.

It’s kind of a no-brainer when your intention is to help your students as much as possible.

I don’t see what all the fuss is about, really.

The students actually love it and the results are phenomenal…

Well..

At least for the non-neurotic ones…

For example,

David-Owen Conway went from “outright failing” before getting our help. Then he used the “utter joke” of our feedback with the individualised stuff and the (gosh-golly) pre-typed stuff, as well a handful of the other components I mentioned above, and on his next attempt got a 75 in the essays getting himself into Griffith.

(HE EVEN GOT AN OFFER FOR DENTISTRY)

He then applied for and got a job with us as…get this… an essay tutor because I dunno…

The help we gave him was so impactful he wanted to give back?

But I’m torn.

On the one hand I want gamta2 to get into medicine having used our stuff, even with the online spaz-attack.

On the other – much bigger – hand, I’m terrified by that concept because what would that mean for the state of medicine and patient care if someone that unhinged is allowed in?

Then it all made sense when I found that this very troll actually works for…

One of the Corporate-Chicken-Farm-Tutoring companies that litter just about every university campus in the country.

I won’t tell you which one – it’s right there in the public domain of Reddit if you really wanna see – because I don’t know if that company actually knows about it, or authorised it. I dunno. So I’ll leave their name out of this for now.

Anyway,

If you want a sneak-peek into our Essay Bootcamp,

If you want to know how to prepare for the essay section regardless of whether you join my Bootcamp or not,

I’m going to be sharing my 4 essentials to writing killer GAMSAT essays, and I’ll also give you the tutorial on how to score in the 100% percentile that we give our students right here.

Cheers,

Dr “Your GAMSAT-date” Tom

P.S. Here are just a few of the things we’ll address in the training:

* The #1 thing that GAMSAT markers are looking for in your essays (they let it slip in a recent document we uncovered) – if you don’t have this it doesn’t matter how many practice essays you write or how amazing a writer you are, you’re pretty much guaranteed to get a shockingly bad score.

* A simple and effective way to come up with almost endless interesting essay ideas…and do it in seconds even if you have the imagination of a brick and less knowledge about the theme than said brick (we learnt from a Journalist who writes to a deadline for a living).

* Two essay structures that have helped to increase essay scores by 25 points and created doctors out of people who barely spoke the language, like Donghxu from China who ended up getting into UQ (I’ll use him as a case study).

* An often overlooked technique to impress the marker with your thinking, argument and flow of ideas… even if you don’t really have any.

* The three steps you need to take right now to be ready for whatever essay topic they throw at you in the exam, even if you’re stressed and feel like this exam is a write-off.

* Why friends who review each other’s essays are probably going to score far worse than someone who applies this proven strategy to making sure your essays are in the 70+ range (even if English is your second language and you’re a science student who’s terrible at essays).

* How to deal with the timeframe so you can get it done without panic and articulate your best ideas.

* Why the essay section is the EASIEST place to increase your score – most people will tell you it’s the hardest!

* My single best way to make your essays stand out from the THOUSANDS of others you are competing against.

*And much more.

Click here to reserve your spot.