A church minister, a doctor and a GAMSAT candidate walk into a bar…
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A church minister walks into the ED with a gash on the back of his finger …
(No, this isn’t the set up for a cheesy joke 😂 although it does involve a doctor, me, and a GAMSAT candidate, you.)
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This is … so much BETTER.
Because apparently …
Our Minister mate here was using a drill press to make holes in a piece of wood in his back shed.
There were some wood shavings obscuring the hole and the drill.
He decided to brush the shavings away with his hand …
The drill was still on …
(I think you can see where this is going)
He hit the spinning drill bit 😱 with the back on his finger and …
Opened it RIGHT UP.
😃
In comes your ol’ mate Dr T.
I know I shouldn’t be so excited but this stuff is fun!
“Hi I’m Tom. I’m one of the cleaners. They looked busy so I thought I’d help out,” I introduce myself.
The Minister is sitting in front of me with his hand on the desk and it’s my job to put it back together again.
It’s on his index finger, the dorsal aspect of the proximal interphalangeal joint (aka the back of the big knuckle in the middle of the finger.)
And the cut is big.
Looks like a novelty halloween gash.
You know those over-the-top zombie one’s people put on their faces.
(On a completely related topic … I actually had a dress-up party for my combined 30th and Medical School Graduation party and dressed as …. a Zombie with novelty gashes.)
But before I stitch up his finger,
I need to see if any underlying structures are injured – things like ligaments, bone, etc.
The Minister’s yapping away.
I explain what I’m going to do and start peeling back the torn skin with some tweezers.
I lean in to get a closer look …
…So does the Minister…
And the view is spectacular.
It’s like an anatomy textbook – I can see EVERYTHING underneath.
Truly a work of God.
The Minister is speechless …
And keep coming in for an even closer look.
…Or so I think…
Because he keeps moving in faster and faster until I release …
He’s passed out!
And it is about to fall out of his chair and flat on his face.
I lunge forward, catch him right before he hits the floor and punch the big red button on the wall to call for help.
A nurse rushes in.
I tell her what happened and she…
Pisses herself laughing!
“Ok, it’s funny but …. too soon, Sister!” I yell as I heave him up onto a bed.
We insert a cannula and give him some fluids. Check his vitals and do all that responsible safe stuff.
He’s OK.
After a few minutes the poor bloke wakes up …really embarrassed.
Apologising profusely.
And I respond with some cheesy canned joke about ‘well, that’s my exercise for the day’ or something like that.
Anyway,
It was the first time someone’s passed out on me and …
Makes for a great dinner party story.
People love to tell me how they, or a family member, don’t like the sight of blood (like that’s all that doctors do – bloooood).
Well, turns out neither does this fella but he didn’t tell me before I went all Hostel movie gory on his hand.
Over to GAMSAT,
The only blood and gore I don’t like is of the GAMSAT variety when people get butchered by it.
(Frankly, I don’t like it in the movies either, but I had to come up with some way to link this story to GAMSAT …)
So if you’d like to have stories like this to tell … because you’re a doctor too … then this will show you how to once and for all smash the GAMSAT.
It covers:
- How to actually begin your GAMSAT preparation
- How to improve your score if you’ve done it before … even if it feels like you’ve studied everything.
- How to manage your time and GAMSAT study to get it all done
- What to study and read
- How to make sure your effort’s actually pay off
- How to best prepare even if you don’t have any science background and/or work full-time
- And a bunch more.
But only here and it’s happening TONIGHT at 7pm QLD time, 8pm NSW/VIC.
Also,
Those who register will also get:
* A diagnostic exam to see where you stand.
* Some serious GAMSAT motivation and kick up the butt
* And a RECORDING of the event in case you miss something or want to re-watch it and really learn the lessons.
Cheers,
Dr “Blood and gore” Tom
